Moments
I recall my first phone conversation with a hospice nurse as we prepared to get my mom set up at home. It was a whirlwind of events that lead us to this point. She said to me, in a somewhat insincere tone, that what was happening within our family would cause us all to examine our own mortality. Although she was right I found her timing and approach to be very insensitive!
Years later I have been given a subtle reminder that I, in fact, also have an expiration date. It has changed my outlook on living but in a much different way. Over the past several months, each day, the smallest moments seem to be more significant. Most recently, during a little trip into town, I found myself thoroughly enjoying the off key (sorry Sydney), out of sync and deliberately loud singing of Christmas carols by my passengers. It was something that I feel like I might have in the past or could have just as easily asked to be toned down. Instead I chose to enjoy it.
I have spent a good deal of the past year in and out of doctors offices; something that I had allowed to become foreign to me. I am doing my best not to let unhappy tasks like those become consuming. Instead I’ll do what I need to do so I can be one step closer to another moment in time that will make me smile. It is surprising how a difference in perspective can make hard decisions and unwanted changes happen so much smoother than they otherwise would.
I am blessed in a million different ways and each day I am thankful for them. Even though 2015 had some bumpy moments I wouldn’t go back and change any of it for it has gotten me to where I am right now.
To all those who choose to join me, I look forward to many more significant little moments in 2016.
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